Get Over It!

My cousin died on the 24th, my bestie just died on December 27, my dad died 9 years ago and his birthday was Dec 22. Every Christmas Eve, without fail, Dad would call me to report that "Santa just left Newfoundland, and he's on his way to you!". I still miss that phone call, and I still cry.

 My dear brother also died at this time of year. As soon as I see Christmas decorations going up, all I can think of is my brother in the hospital in Halifax, and the fact that Christmas Eve was the last time I spoke with him and hugged him. The last time I saw him alive, he had 14 tubes connected to him, and was unconcious. 

 So yeah, sorry if I can't just get over it.
Sorry if I I'm not on top of my game.
Sorry if I can't live up to all of your expectations right now.

 Sorry I'm a perfectly imperfect human.

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